Its been a weird few days for me. We work 24 hour shifts with 24 off and I have a lot of time with my thoughts. One recurring question I have is: What exactly am I doing here? I'm sure a lot of you have your own answers to that question and I guess so do I. I'm just trying to figure out EXACTLY why we are here...still. At least in previous wars, correct me if I'm wrong, we had a distinct purpose. And I guess to a certain degree, there was a purpose to this one as well, no matter how tainted or corrupt it was. So, here we are, 9 years and counting. What is the purpose now? What are we spending millions or should I say billions of dollars for? Why is there 8 lights on surrounding a soccer field on our base with no one playing soccer? I guess it just doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me anymore.
The other day we were called to a scene for crowd control. I may get in trouble for saying this but oh well I guess. People were gathering around a secured area where there was a suspicious package. Anyone want to know what that package was? Any guesses? Okay, I'll tell you. It was a box of toilet paper. Guess where it was? Next to a portable toilet (port-a-john.) How funny right? Okay that's why I'm confused about the reason we're here. Am I here to make sure people don't get suspicious of a box of TP next to a toilet? Heaven forbid someone try to keep the stuff stocked up.
Part of me is just frustrated a little. Can you tell? On my last tour, we actually went out on missions that would better the people of this country. We actually spent time "outside the wire" looking for insurgents. And I suppose there are those soldiers still so I guess what I'm doing is just a let down for me. My platoon would do 24 hour operations and that didn't mean sitting in a building waiting, it meant we got enough food and water to last us that time and went out and hid in the bushes near a road or sat on a roof top observing.
In 2004 when I was in northern Iraq, things were completely different. I lived in a tent, ate 2 meals a day and they were luke warm at best. This tour I can have 4 meals a day, shower everyday and use as much water as I want. I have access to unlimited Gatorade, Coke, Mountain Dew, Pepsi and Mongolian BBQ as I could possibly want. SGT Polson, a great friend of mine, put it perfectly: No matter where America goes, whether it be for a war or not, it lives in abundance. Yesterday was steak and lobster for dinner. How the hell does that happen? How do I go from struggling some days to find something to eat at home to eating lobster with the person serving me asking if I want 2? I almost feel bad wasting the food that I get too. In '04, Iraqi kids would fight over a "Jolly Rancher" and I have a box in my CHU collecting dust. I don't know, maybe I'm just rambling and none of this makes sense to any of you.
Alright I'm done, thanks for reading... P.S. Thats me in the middle. :)
Wow! I've been truly amazed at the government waste in my exposure to the Army through Chad. What you describe only drives that point home. I can't say the men & women in your shoes shouldn't be comfortable but, you're right... do you really need a weekly steak & lobster night?
ReplyDeleteYour story of the box of TP reminded me of a news article I read last month regarding stuffed animals being left on cars in a North Dakota hospital parking lot. The police were notified to investigate the stuffed animals to be sure they weren't something harmful. Really? Someone's random act of kindness being investigated as a possible terrorist act? Wow! How sad.
Thanks for your honesty & service, Mitch!
That's fascinating Mitch-and something to think about.
ReplyDeleteMy heart breaks for you. I know how you felt about going back over there. And to have this disappointing experience just adds to the frustration. I'm so sorry. I have those same questions. WHY are we still over there and wtf are we doing to help?? And wasn't one of Obama's major platforms stopping the war?? Is it even a war anymore? I don't understand any of it. I'm sorry you feel the was you do. Just know we're proud of you.
ReplyDeleteI don't think its sad that the TP had to be investigated... What I think is sad is that it has come to that point. There is so much hatred in our world these days that even stuffed animals COULD pose a threat. I think about when I was a child, and how times have changed. Its too bad, but its good to know that there are people like yourself who are willing to sacrifice to keep people like me safe. And, yeah... I can see the wasteful side of it, but I can also say this: You deserve steak and lobster for your sacrifice. :)
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